Parent and Consultant: Summer Edition
The particular ways summer can work in a parent consultant's favor.
Today’s post is a guest piece from someone new to these pages, and I couldn’t be happier about it: Sam Heffner, founder of See Three Solutions here in New York. We first met over lunch at last fall’s Yale Alumni Nonprofit Alliance conference, got to talking again a few months later, and I came away certain I wanted to introduce her to all of you. When Sam had an idea for a piece for this Substack, I leaped at the chance!
Sam is a corporate lawyer by training (Yale, then Fordham Law) who now spends her days in the nonprofit world, working with boards on governance, training, and the kind of retreats that actually move teams forward. She’s on the New York City Bar’s Nonprofits Organization Committee, she runs a family office subcommittee for that group, and she participates on the AI task force. Sam presents at social enterprise conferences at NYU, and she’s spent years helping smaller nonprofits get the essential, unglamorous things right. She’s also a native New Yorker and a parent of two, which is what brings her here today.
Back in the spring, my essay on being a parent and a consultant started a great conversation, and Allison Ehrich Bernstein followed up with a wonderful counterpoint. Now Sam carries it into summer. Her question: what if we parent consultants borrowed a little from the kids’ summer playbook? It’s warm, practical, and full of specifics that felt like summer in a bottle.
I’ll hand it over to Sam from here.
Sam Landenwitsch’s recent essay and Allison’s wonderful counterpoint have made the question of balance so front and center for many of us “parent consultants.” I have been a parent far longer than I have been a solo nonprofit consultant. With tweens ages twelve and thirteen, they are accustomed to my five-year old business being the baby in the family.
The perennial juggle for balance and avoiding what Sam deemed a “zero sum game” is sticking with me as the summer months arrive. Even with longer days and kids attending various summer activities and programs, the joys of summer make finding balance easier in some ways yet harder in others. With July 4th in our rearview, friends and colleagues already started the quiet echo “summer is flying by!” Uh-oh.
My only addition to the valuable point/counterpoint my colleagues explored is the added layer of how a parent consultant should also navigate other caregiving responsibilities (such as aging parents). That is another post entirely, loaded with the privilege of living parents and the acute stressors of sandwich generation realities.
But back to the sunny optimism of a more relaxed summer schedule with longer days, warm-weather pursuits and more-than-appropriate runs to the ice cream shop or driving range (guilty, both counts). How should a parent consultant use more time outdoors and variable family schedules to maximize work (quantity and quality) and some joy? Inspired by my kids’ summer work reading and essay requirements, I thought maybe the adults should be borrowing a bit from the kids’ summer playbook.
Lemonade Stand Pluck
Sometimes it’s the sweet-tart formula that sells, or even an arresting, bright bubble-letter sign. But usually the stand’s success boils down to the age old, “location, location, location.” Consultants could stand to revisit our version of the secret ingredient formulation. Instead of the water, sugar, lemon ratio, ours usually rests on what new or different value-add should we be building for our business and our clients? Where should we iterate or innovate? How do our (more polished and usually virtual) signs attract future engagements? Consider your marketing signs through an expansive lens; use a few extra moments this summer to evaluate your client satisfaction and long-standing tactics.
Purely anecdotally, last summer I simply tried a variety of locations in NYC. I met a colleague for lunch in Soho one day and camped out for a coffee on the Upper East Side on a different day. Both times I randomly bumped into an interesting nonprofit leader. In one instance, I wanted to follow-up with the professional and in the other, I made a key introduction. New and renewed client connections only happen when you keep your head up, eyes clear, and heart open. Just as Sam’s essay noted that consulting work lets you “spread” your professional identity across projects, this season itself might be conducive to “spreading” yourself around. Your special sauce might not change much this summer, but keep in mind the opportunities around your physical location.
Outdoors, Creative Time
For many lucky kids, summertime means running around outside, biking, and swimming from dawn to dusk. Especially for families outside of large cities. Parent consultants don’t really have the same luxury, but we can adapt that rhythm into smaller, manageable bites.
I live near Central Park. and I always feel more creative and sharper after a long walk in the park. Without the morning off-to-school rush, I have the space to make a long walk happen. Besides the sun and endorphins, it’s the scenery in the park which grounds me for the rest of the day. I also use the visual cues of the skyline, houses of worship, and landmark towers of Central Park West to open ideas about workforce trends, religion, the arts, landmarks, parks, and more. I especially enjoy “the regulars” who run rain or shine and remind me that persistence pays. If I bump into a friend or former colleague as sometimes happens too, added bonus. The park is my kind of scene.
If time outdoors sparks creativity, as studies support, this is a huge opportunity for busy parent consultants. Since solo work lacks built-in thought partners, it can be tough to refine new ideas. Claude notwithstanding. Being in nature encourages curiosity, and that beginner’s mind is exactly what many consultants need to keep their clients’ perspectives fresh (and their own!).
Revisit your To-Do List Sharply
For many kids, summer encourages new activities, jobs, camps, programs, and community service. Summer is sometimes the only flexible time to fast-track something unexplored to the top of your “to-do” list. So what should the parent consultant lob to the top of the list? I’ve learned over the years, the short answer is…not too much! Do not bite off more than you can chew. Please be incredibly intentional about your time even with longer days and (possibly more) windows of available work hours.
Allison’s essay referenced the power of her peer communities; I wholeheartedly agree. My circles of peer consultants have not only combatted isolation but continue to open doors for me. Even this opportunity to contribute to a peer’s Substack is a meaningful chance to collaborate. Accordingly, I always make my summer to-do list prioritize those in person touch points with local consultants and clients that never happened during the “school year.” While I’m spending more time this summer digging into AI (thanks to colleagues like Sam), I’m also trying to keep a steady cadence of in-person exchanges.
Take a brutally honest look at that summer to-do list again. If an item has sat on your list for more than one summer, consider jettisoning the same. Even I got tired of hearing myself say “I’m going to update my website this summer!” Turns out, it wasn’t actually pressing enough to take shape. Boosted by one of my peer communities of nonprofit lawyers digging into AI tools, I pivoted this past June. Instead of dreaming about that snappier looking website, I realized building an app to streamline my workflow would pay dividends into the Fall and Winter (and maybe that app could improve my website too?!).
The same holds true for my clients who juggle so many pressing projects. Strategically, what is summertime dictating to adopt or revisit? For those organizations coming off a cycle of governance and re-writing the by-laws/handbook/policies, I encourage them to get the team outdoors for a BBQ or service opportunity. For those teams who have just rotated off a capital campaign, I recommend their “fresh air” prescription as more site visits and hands-on work. An antidote to an events-heavy Spring schedule might be a simple coffee with a new or lapsed programmatic partner/corporate sponsor. Summer schedules could make a terrific window for a staff offsite or board retreat. Or if summer means lots of travel for your team, it is an excellent time to plan a Fall staff meeting or board offsite. With a delicate approach, shape your days to include both recharging and targeted productivity.
Summer Homework Lessons Learned
Schools assign summer work to mitigate learning loss and keep students plugged into critical thinking and cumulative math skills (among other reasons). Talking to my son about a draft summer essay (as a parent) reminded me (as a consultant) about the power of editing and revising. Off-season schoolwork feels like visiting a beach town during the off-season – spectacular scenery and simply less hectic. The skills we learn as students play through. I am motivated to go back to a few of my working templates and decks to edit and improve my offerings. My school year routine doesn’t prompt the import of editing the way this summer work reflection did. Summer reading, writing, and revisions also give some real-time feedback about the places where we have improved and the spots which still demand extra attention. We could all use more moments of noticing patterns, celebrating successes, and finding cycles of renewed purpose.
As Fall descends on the parent consultants, try to use lingering warm weather to remain outside a bit and test some of your “summer work” findings about important pivots and strategic revisions.
Mission-driven Work is a Privilege
I agree with Allison when she suggested she’s a better parent for doing a mission-focused job, but I also see it slightly differently. I hope that working in spaces focused on dignity, social justice, and equitable outcomes actually makes me a more empathetic human (which includes parent, spouse, sister, daughter, cousin, neighbor, etc.). My exposure to different nonprofits energizes me every day, along with copious amounts of coffee and matcha. Most days, I bubble over with excitement to tackle the work. Does that excitement and job satisfaction give me more patience as a parent for dirty socks everywhere and scratched-to-bleeding bug bites? Firm no. Does mission-driven work make me a more open-minded, curious, and energized (human and) parent? Hopefully so.
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